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Becoming Complaint Free

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What Are You Complaining About?

Ever pay attention to what your complaints are? Ever try to go complaint free?  Complaints are by and large a symptom of unhappiness.  Encarta defines them as:

- statement of unhappiness: a statement expressing discontent or unhappiness about
a situation

- If you have any complaints, talk to the manager.

- something making somebody unhappy: something that makes somebody
discontented or unhappy

Are You Unhappy?

Sometimes we go about life completely unaware of how profoundly unhappy we are.  We manage the day to day tasks and we’re so totally busy that we don’t even pause to evaluate if we’re happy, content or peaceful.

If we were to pause and take an honest look at our state of serenity and explore whether we’re on the right path, then the answer would probably be fairly obvious.  A great way to make a quick assessment is to explore what you’re complaining about.

What do you constantly complain about?

Very few things are completely perfect.  You can have a splendid day and still get a flat tire.  You can be living your ideal life and still get a pounding headache.  Things happen. Occasional complaints are normal and how you handle them and respond to them are indications of whether you’re on the right path.

Complaints that are chronic and recurring are the external result of internal discontent.  So real quick, think about what you’re complaining about?  Do you find that the complaints are all related to a common theme or a few common themes?

The great news is that by simply taking a look at what you’re complaining about, you can see where you need to make changes.

For example, if you find that you’re often complaining about your boss then you know that it’s time to do some work around your relationship with this person, or perhaps about your career.  Maybe you vent about your boss, but your career is unfulfilling and your boss is simply an easy target.

Turning Complaints Into Positive Action

Complaints are by their very nature negative.  They’re chock full of negative energy and they draw more negative energy to them.  So if you’re complaining regularly about your health, well guess what…your health isn’t going to get better because you’re drawing more ill health to you.

However because they are easy to recognize, complaints can also be a powerful source of opportunity.  Every time you complain you can stop, think about it, and do some internal evaluation.  Eventually, you’ll be able to stop and turn your complaint into a positive statement and draw what you want to you rather than more unpleasantness into your life.

Becoming Complaint Free

The Rev. Will Bowen, author of A Complaint Free World: How to Stop Complaining and Start Enjoying the Life You Always Wanted challenged his congregation to live complaint free.  In order to help them remember to stop complaints before they speak they wear a purple bracelet.  Every time they complained they were to remove the bracelet or switch it to their other wrist – the goal being to go complaint free for 21 days straight.

Recognizing your complaints can help you to eventually live a serene and complaint free life.  Take a look at what you’re complaining about, use it to get back on track living the life you want and start living a complaint free life today.

© Deborah A. Lindholm

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEBSITE? You can, but you must include the following resource information in its entirety: Deborah and Michael Lindholm are co-owners of Serenity Matters, LLC. They are dedicated to empowering clients and students with the Serenity Vibration Healing® tools. If  you’re ready to awaken your inner power and surge forward in your life, get your FREE tips at

Categories : Empowerment, SVH®
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To be disempowered in your relationship means that you allow your partner to have more control over your life and circumstances than you exercise. You give up your power in favor of him or her and you end up feeling confused, helpless and hopeless. This can take place over time and happen without your conscious awareness.

The most extreme disempowerment comes about in cases of domestic violence or verbal and emotional abuse. In these cases, safety has to be the main concern and seeking professional guidance and the assistance of authorities is warranted.

Even under less severe circumstances, when a person enters into a romantic relationship or gets married, unknown triggers can go off within their psyche and change everything. In this context, triggers refer to situations, events, memories or even words and body language that cause an individual to act differently in a relationship. The triggers change how the person would normally behave under other circumstances outside of the relationship.

When we initially act differently towards and around our partner than our usual nature, things can get complicated in the relationship later on. At first, we might make seemingly small concessions in the spirit of compromise or to please our partner. However if we continue doing this, expectations get cemented in about who we are and resentment can occur within our partner when we attempt to be our authentic self. Feelings of being trapped can set in on our part.

Take notice that you may be disempowered in your relationship if any of the following sounds familiar:

  • You deny your true feelings, beliefs and desires
  • It’s nearly always about what he/she wants
  • You’re not who you used to be
  • You think this as good as it gets
  • You hide purchases of products and services
  • He/she doesn’t know your best friends or you have none
  • You are afraid to make a change

The root cause of the changes in our behavior and attitudes may stem from how we believe we are supposed to act in a committed relationship. There can be a tendency to subconsciously repeat the behaviors we observed in our family of origin and we aren’t even aware that we’re doing this.

If you’ve ever thought that you or your partner act like your mother or father, that’s a clue. You may want to look at this and evaluate whether or not taking on the behaviors of your parents in your own relationship works for you.

Even if your self-esteem and self-confidence are intact prior to entering into your relationship or marriage, you may find that this changes when you alter who you are even in small ways for someone else. It may seem easy to do in the beginning, but it really is unhealthy for you and your partner in the long run.

Ultimately we feel the stress of having to maintain our facade of happiness or we start to slip and can no longer maintain whatever it is that we’ve been allowing in the relationship that goes against our true self. Unhappiness and dissatisfaction can become the norm accompanied by aggressive or passive behaviors on our part. If this happens, being honest with your partner about your true feelings gives both of you a chance to re-evaluate the relationship and how you relate to each other when you are being authentic.

Realistically, your partner may be unable to accept you or alter their behavior to accommodate you or be authentic themselves. Obviously, you both have the option to stay in the relationship or leave.

None of this is easy, but the price to pay for keeping things as they are when you are in a disempowered relationship is high. You risk losing your sense of self and that always leads to a vicious cycle of suffering and more disempowered feelings.

If this discussion brought up any feelings of unease within you or curiosity about the subject matter, please listen to the 10 minute recording below. It is my gift to you – an exercise that engages your conscious mind, your subconscious mind, your Higher Self and the Creator to assist you in clearing away whatever within you is allowing yourself to attract disempowering relationships or become disempowered within a relationship.

Right click the link below and save the audio file to your computer,
or click the link to listen online.

Your Relationship Clearing

© Deborah A. Lindholm

WANT TO USE THIS ARTICLE IN YOUR E-ZINE OR WEBSITE? You can, but you must include the following resource information in its entirety: Deborah and Michael Lindholm are co-owners of Serenity Matters, LLC. They are dedicated to empowering clients and students with the Serenity Vibration Healing® tools. If  you’re ready to awaken your inner power and surge forward in your life, get your FREE tips at

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Free Yourself from Fear Fast!

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Fearless Fridays Telesummit

Deborah Lindholm will be conducting a FREE program that is designed to Free You From Fear Fast! And, you’ll be able to do it right on the call – transform fear so it no longer holds you back! Join Deborah on March 19th at 5 pm EST. If  you can’t make the live event, listen in later to the recording. This is your ticket to benefit in real time, right there on the spot. In the program, you will:

• Get the scoop on the 3 sources of fear that will surprise you and make you say, “Ahaa!” and never feel like you have to live with any limiting fear again.
• Discover your giant inner file that fears hide in; how this file acts like it owns you and what to do when it’s up to its old tricks.
• Tap into the 3 levels of consciousness everyone can access and use them to get clear and focused and free yourself from fear in a jiffy.
• Learn about the fastest way to speed up the release of fears so that nothing within you ever has the power to hold you back!
• And, much more…including free gifts and special offers!

To register for this program and learn about the other 30 experts lined up by Sophfronia Scott for The Fearless Fridays Telesummit, please go to

Together, let’s spring forward and get rid of fear fast!

Serenity Vibration Healing® Teleclasses

Discover the Secrets of Serenity and Learn Amazing Self-Empowering Tools in the new year.

The feeling of being able to do something for yourself that makes a huge difference in your life is unbelievably satisfying……and well…self-empowering!

“When we get in touch with that essential part of our being, then anything is possible, no matter the obstacles. The SVH® teleclasses give you the tools to live and dream life without limitation.”

Amy Yancy, Charleston, SC

Serenity Vibration Healing® is a cutting edge technique that gives you the clarity to create the life you want. It quickly frees you from unwanted and limiting thoughts, beliefs, attitudes, and memories. It’s easy to learn over the phone and no experience is necessary.

Our next series of Serenity Vibration Healing® Level 1 teleclasses begin in February. The full schedule is posted on our calendar at

Taking part in a group phone class is easy, fun, convenient and cost effective. You can do a class from anywhere you have access to a phone. The classes are filled with rich content and the manual has recently been updated.

For more information and to register, go to . Class size is limited.

If you have any questions, call Deborah at 843-991-5089 or e-mail

Categories : SVH®
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As the world becomes more and more complicated, our past catches up with our present and both interfere with our future. What would it be like if you could clear away the complications and focus on what is truly important to you? How would you like to be able to tap into who you are at your core and who you are meant to be in any moment? Serenity Vibration Healing® (SVH) clears out the junk and assists you to access your inner power source – unfettered and unencumbered.

The World Is More Than What It Appears To Be

Quantum physics has made great leaps (no pun intended) in the study of energy and matter. Because of this, we know that everything including all physical forms and even your physical body and thoughts are composed of energy. All energy vibrates and has a unique type of vibration or energy signature. Sound vibrates, light vibrates, your thoughts and speech vibrate, and your physical body and energy bodies vibrate too.

Now think about where these vibrations go. They go out into the world, into the universe and they are around us and within us. They affect us and what we create in our lives. Think about it like this – imagine walking into a room where two people have been fighting. You didn’t hear the argument and perhaps are completely unaware that they’ve been fighting, but you sense a negative energy in the room.

You may call it a bad vibe or you may think something like this cliché, “You could cut the tension with a knife.” It is the vibrational energy of their thoughts and words that you are sensing and picking up on. It affects not only those who come into contact with it but those involved in the argument too. Their entire body reacts along with their mind and their emotions.

How Tapping Into The Vibrations Can Change Your Life

Understanding that every thought you have and word you speak carries with it a vibration is a significant beginning to changing your life. In a Serenity Vibration Healing® session you are simply asked to state what’s on your mind. The technique is essentially a form of active prayer facilitated by a certified practitioner, who engages your higher aspect of self and provides specific directives to the Creator on your behalf. The process clears genetic predispositions, current life imprinting and soul lineage influences that are interfering with your ideal life.

As you state what is on your mind in a session by phone, email or in person, your thoughts and words are used to discover and uncover blocks and barriers to your stated goals. Any and all imbalances detected are re-scripted, reformatted, released and transformed by the Creator in an instant and your frequency of vibration improves and changes to provide clarity and serenity.

The clarity and serenity experienced in SVH sessions further assists you to:

Make better, clearer, decisions
Eradicate limiting beliefs and negative self talk
Clear past experiences that have held you back
Activate your innate gifts
Become who you are meant to be

This easy and effective form of active prayer helps you tap into your inner power source and access your inner strength and clarity. It’s a tool to literally reprogram and fine-tune the strengths that reside within you to give you more power over your life and your reality. Imagine being able to quiet all of the outside influences, limiting beliefs, and negative self-talk which surround you every day and instead hear the simple quiet voice inside you that speaks with clarity and confidence. The result would be better decisions and a happier, more profound and empowered life.


Serenity is within your grasp with help from Serenity Empowerment Coach, Deborah Lindholm. Let her show you how to live an empowered life every single day. Download free pre-recorded telecasts, grab your “5 Simple Steps To Get What You Really, Really Want” report and more here: Free Stuff at Serenity Matters


Serenity is within your grasp with Serenity Empowerment Coach, Deborah Lindholm. Let her show you how to live an empowered life every single day. Download free pre-recorded telecasts, your “5 Simple Steps To Get What You Really, Really Want” report & more at


As always, please consult with qualified health professionals before putting session or workshop ideas into practice. The ideas and techniques are not meant to diagnose or replace the need for medical attention or professional mental health care.

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